Fear Itself

I recently interviewed serveral people for open positions on my service team. I always end interviews with the same question…..”What makes you the best person for the position?” Usually, I get the expected answers such as: I’m reliable, I’m organized, I’m a hard worker or I’m a self-starter. Rarely does someone surprise me with their response to my question, but I was actually caught off guard by one girl during this round of interviews. She told me that she works hard to learn new things and then looked me right in the eye and said “I’m not afraid to be better.”

That simple statement stuck with me and I have spent a considerable amount of time thinking about how it applies to my own life. How many things do I just settle for because it is easier? Because it is familiar and safe? Because it requires little or no effort? And then I wondered…..is this the cause of my fitness struggle? Am I afraid to be better? The answer, I believe, is yes.

If that is true, if I am afraid to be better, the question now becomes why and more importantly, how do I correct it? For me, it has been easier to hide behind excuses than to really try to push myself past barriers. Believe me when I say that I have had dozens of excuses. Everything from bad knees and not enough time to lack of knowledge and experience. Here is the thing about excuses, no matter how many you have, they are not reasons to not do something.

So what were the actual reasons that were keeping me from following through with my fitness goals? Well, honestly, changing your lifestyle is hard. And it kinda sucks. And it’s hard. Did I mention how hard it is? You have to learn new things and apply them consistantly. You have to accept that you aren’t always going to be good at something right away. You have to be willing to make better food choices. My squats suck and I still can’t jump rope. I really want a taco and some pizza. It is frustrating and I want to quit on a daily basis. And I have quit more than once because I have been afraid to be better. I have been scared to draw a line in the sand because what if I fail? What if I can’t actually make the changes I need to make? What if I’m not strong enough? The true is, I’m not strong enough and that is why I’m afraid.

The funny thing about fear is that once you recognize and embrace it, it becomes a powerful source of motivation. I am making better food choices because deadlifts are too dang hard to waste on empty calories. I am pushing through the wall I hit halfway through the fourth set of squats even if my form isn’t perfect. I’m throwing around heavier weights because it makes me feel like a badass. I’m still trying to jump rope and learning to laugh a little in the process because any progress, no matter how small, is still progress. So no, I’m not strong enough today, but I will be stronger tomorrow. Why? Because now I’m not afraid to be better.